Harnessing the Strength to Ignite: Second Coaching conversation with Lori Davenport

Lori Davenport Coaching 2

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[00:00:00] Okay. All right. Lori, how have you been? It's been a little while since I've talked to you. I know you had some stuff happen, but that's okay. Life happens. But how are you? Are you doing? All

right. Doing well. Doing well. Yeah. I'm excited about some of the things that I'm getting into and, um, the fact that I got my SOP at least started, so, uh, yay, and, um, got out of some things that I don't need to be in anymore.

And now I'm like just starting a new, so my, um, My word for this year at first, when somebody was asking me about it, at the end of 23 was awaken, but I'm going more. So with ignite. So, yeah,

what brought that? Why did that, why did that night happen? I mean, awake, it's awesome. And I understand that works, but why, why was that word set for you?[00:01:00]

Well, a couple of reasons. One, um, I have. I've been training a girl, um, at my full time job and she's just like, you know, I don't know what I would have done without you. And you've been such a great trainer and you know, you, you take the time and you go through me and I was, you know, go through things with me and, um, and I, it's just like, I don't have her strengths report, but I can tell she's got a lot of similar strengths to myself, but she does have things where you have to not overwhelm her.

But I, so I was able to train her in a way that ignited her spirit. So she was able, and I'm not, I'm not going woo woo with this at all. I'm going into the fact that I could get into her intellect and she was able to succeed. and grow without overwhelm. So it ignited something in her in the way of her learning that [00:02:00] she was excited about.

So, and I want to ignite excitement and that's where I'm going.

So that ignited her, how did that ignite you?

The fact that I was able to, cause I'm constantly saying, I don't want to overwhelm you because I overwhelmed myself throughout the time and, um. I said, I don't want to give you too much information at once.

So I was like, tell me if I'm giving you too much information. She's like, you're not. And I'm so grateful for everything that you like make me aware of. And you help me to see that I don't normally see. And, you know, I can just see the glow, exciting, you know, being excited with her. And that just excites me.

So it's just like, yes, I'm moving her forward. So it's just like, and by doing things the right way from things that I've learned, you know, and, and ways to create things, um, that make it [00:03:00] simple. So. It's been very, very exciting.

Good, good. That's actually amazing. I love the fact that you're able to ignite cause that's our word, right?

Yeah. Somebody else with your personality, with your questions and having the presence of mind to listen to them long enough to understand where they're at. Cause that's a major part of that too. A lot of people like I heard that the, uh, the interruption time for our doctors, like 18 seconds. So it's like, I, whenever I think about that, it's like 18 seconds, there's nobody that's going to be able to get across anything in 18 seconds.

So being able to take the time to actually listen to her, understand what her problem is. And then not only that, but be able to, uh, understand where she's coming from and able to articulate what she, you know, be able to listen to what she actually needs from you, but still checking in and say, are you okay?

Am I overwhelming you? And that kind of thing. That's amazing. That's, [00:04:00] that's, that's awesome. I'm glad you're able to do that. So the question is really, can you do that with other people? You think? I

do. I do. Um, I'm learning how to do two things, one to coach, which I've been learning forever. And I get that.

I get how to coach, but to mentor is a totally different beast. And, you know, so I would with teaching her, I'm also mentoring her because I know even starting next week, I'm moving on to something else. So I'm moving, it's the same company, but a different, a different position. And if anything, I've set her up for success.

It's like, okay, so now instead of saying, this is where he goes, this is what you do. Here's the step by step is like, okay. So if I wasn't there. And you couldn't get ahold of anybody, where would you go next? [00:05:00] And let her think it through more so than me telling her the answer. So that was, that was an eye opener for me, for me too.

So that's where I'm at. It's good. That's

good. That's really good. Explain to me your definition, the difference between coaching and mentoring. Cause for me, it's very similar. So there's gotta be like, what's the actual main difference between in your mind? I want your answer. Yeah. I don't want like the textbook answer.

I want your answer.

So for me, it's like, if you have a technique that you're, you're teaching, okay. That is part of the coaching coaching is, is more along the lines of explaining the technique. Giving the step by step and, um, and then making sure that they understand it kind of like a quiz, you know, but then with mentoring, it's just like, [00:06:00] how would you approach this?

So they would tell me the step by step, they would tell me the technique and they would, so they're doing more of the talking instead of me. So, you know, and I know teaching and coaching, you know, can sometimes get confusing too, because teaching, you know, you're teaching, talking, talking, talking, but you're asking questions at the same time when you're coaching.

Whereas, you know, and I know you can ask questions with teaching as well, but, you know, ultimately there's just an answer with teaching. And I sometimes get those two mixed up. I will say that. But, um, but once they know the technique, then you can implement with coaching, kind of like teaching too. But, um, but teaching sometimes when you teach something and people learn it, it's like they either take it or they leave it.

But with coaching is like, they've come to you for something. They, they're like, this is the specific thing I want to work on. Can you help me out with that? [00:07:00] And You know, so then you can, you know, get them to bounce back and forth and, you know, give them techniques or what have you, but then. Something thought provoking more so than just, okay, you've done your answers now moving on and it's like out of sight out of mind.

Right?

Right. Exactly. Me personally. And I'm just going to give you kind of my thing. My thing. It is really close for teaching and coaching, but the teaching thing when I think teaching, I think, okay, this is the curriculum. This is the, this is what I have to follow. I get the answer. I try to get them the answer.

Once they actually get the answer, I move on. Just like you're saying but coaching on the other hand is not just getting the answer. It's also getting their feeling about the answer It's getting their their emotion about the answer. Why did you answer that way? What what do you feel when you say this answer?

And then that's that's kind of what I think I think teaching like I'm talking to 30 students were coaching I'm [00:08:00] talking and giving my full attention to one person

right or even if it is a small group It's like, what do you want to do? I've figured out that there's, there's three small questions when it comes to coaching, at least to start.

What do you want to do? Why do you want to do it? How is it going to make you feel? And then if you really want to get fun, you can ask the fourth questions. What's going to happen if you don't achieve that? Then you can get both sides.

So explain to me those questions. What do you want? When do you want it?

And how do you want it? It's, did I say those right? What do you

want to do? Why do you want to do why? Okay. And how does it make you feel? How would that make you feel? Sorry. How would that make you feel? Yeah.

So when he asked somebody, what. What I mean, let's, let's take your, your protege. I'm going to call [00:09:00] it a protege just because I can.

Um, when you ask her what, what, I don't want you to get too like technical or like into her thing, but when you say what, what does that mean?

Basically, it tells me where does she want to go from where she's at to where she wants to go with whatever it is. So and then why do you want to do it gives me her why

okay?

I'm gonna circle back to what I I I feel like there's more to that Get deeper in the what get deeper in that.

So what do you want to do? um, I guess because you know if you want to strive for certain positions, I'm not that the Management type that will say, well, that's going to, you know, you're going to, you're going after my job.

I actually want her to drink. I want to train her my job that way. If I'm not there, she can handle it. [00:10:00] She can do it. And it's like, well, what do you want to do? I want to learn everything that I can. Perfect. Well, I'll teach you my position as I've been learning it. And that way you can succeed in either one taking my position.

If I decided to move on. Or two able to run it, uh, run the place without me here.

So when you explain it to me that way, it feels like teaching. You're teaching her your, your, uh, the way you with her,

I you do things. Yeah. And with her, with her, I am with coaching though. When it comes stepping aside to when I've been coaching, it's, um, what did I do with that?

I guess I have been mixing up the teaching and the coaching a lot lately only because I have been, um, teaching a lot. So, [00:11:00] uh, but with coaching, you know, if you wish I had my list of questions, because I have a bunch of questions and I didn't come with the questions because I was so focusing on the SOP, but, um, nonetheless, it's, if you ask a bunch of open ended questions, instead of the yes and no's.

And get their, their answers from their heart, then, then, you know, you're, you're coaching rather than, yes.

Okay. So what we need to do is, is flip that thinking from, from teaching to coaching and not just asking the yes or no. Can you do this? Can you not do this? But like I said earlier, how do we feel about it?

How does you make you feel? And that kind of thing. That's when it turns into coaching, right? Right. That's when it turns into, you know, let me turn that off. Sorry. Um, when it turns into, Yeah. You know, actually listening to their, to those particular [00:12:00] answers, not just the yes or no answers, but why does it make you feel this way?

Answers, right? That's when it turns into coaching, right? So that's why I was saying, I need you to dig a little more into the, what, because the, what you were giving me was just the yes or no. And what I want is the emotion that's behind the, what,

I guess that's the reason why I did the three questions to start, you know, which is, what do you want to do?

Um, Why do you want to do it? How does that make you feel? So they're all kind of all in one. It doesn't, we don't, I mean, the way I started it before, I was like, I didn't dig too deep because it was like, what do you want to do? Why do you want to do it? And so get those simple answers. And then we could go deeper with, you know, how does that make you feel?

And. Then ask more, you know, more inquisitive questions and figuring out what their strengths are if I don't have a report and Then you know, all right. Well, this is how we could make this work, you know [00:13:00] to help you with whatever it is You want to put your your strengths

towards so and then now explain the why to me?

Why do you want to do it? You know, what's the driving force? Basically behind it So, um, how the more questions that you would ask you, you would get a more definitive answer. Like I know that there's a book, I think it's five wise or something like that. Like the more you ask the why the deeper that you get and it actually gets to the feeling, but you know, it's like, well.

Um, then it really makes you think so. And I think it's five levels deep. I don't remember the name of the person who wrote the book, but nonetheless. Yeah, [00:14:00] no, that's fine. The more you go into the Why it actually defines the why

So why gets us to, uh, if you had Russian dolls, you remember those doll, the doll inside the doll, we keep peeling those off until we get to the smallest one there.

And that's where we want to hit. That's, that's our ultimate goal. The end is that Why right there is what makes us do what we do and how we do it and where we do it and things like that. It's because of that Why So. If you notice, and I don't know if you knew this or not, but there's actually five dolls and all those, right?

So same difference, right? We want to peel off at least five of those layers to get to that. Why? To get to that last Russian doll to see, we can understand where we're going to go. So, so tell me about the, how now tell me about the, how.

So when it is, how does that make you feel like if you can't drill to the feeling of the, why it's like, how does that, like, this is why I want to do it.

This is what you want [00:15:00] to do. How would that make you feel? And people tend to go to the positive, but not the deep meaning positive. If you do it quickly. Um, but then it's like, well, how would it make you feel if you didn't achieve that? You quickly see the slippery slope. And, you know, it'd be great. It'd be great.

It'd be great. Oh my God. I can't. I don't know if I can do that. And well, this is why we're here to figure out your right way. What are your steps? Let's, let's ask more questions. Let's do more sessions. Let's figure it out. So how

do those answers make you feel? Right? Exactly. Okay. So Laurie, what, what do you want?

Well, I figured out that I definitely want to. Ignite the [00:16:00] belief in people again, because I feel like, oh, my goodness, this world has lost themselves in a lot of ways. A lot of people, I keep on coming across people who just, I don't know if it's because of COVID, I'm blaming it on COVID, but that's just me, you know, with people being cooped up for as long as they were.

And even those that weren't, I was one of those that wasn't. I was one of those, you know, people that had to go to work because of the position I was in and where I was working, you know, we were essential personnel. So we had to go to work through it, you know, but I'm just coming across so many people that have just lost themselves and they're angry or they're sad or they're stuck and And then I'm not even a relationship builder and I'm just like, oh, my gosh, I got to help these people.

So I want to, when I [00:17:00] came across what, what my strengths can do to help others, it was just like an epiphany, um, the other day. And that is, you know, I just want to, you know, use my strengths to believe, you know, ignite the belief in others. You know, so that way, um, it says my strengths, I found it, my strengths, I had to, I had to write it down.

That's okay. Help me to ignite the belief inside me, create clarity, get things done and inspire things to come. I continue to learn to be me, create purpose and think about new ways to get, you know, to get things done. They will forever help me move forward. My strengths will forever help me move forward.

So, and the turnaround to that is I use my strengths to help others ignite belief in themselves and [00:18:00] to create clarity, to get things done and to inspire things to come and help them to learn, to be them, continue to learn, to be them, create purpose and think about new ways of doing things. Their strengths will forever help them move forward good.

So is that is that your own writing? That's awesome. Thank you That's you you make sure you put that somewhere where you see it all the time

Oh, I'm reading it every morning and every night gotta

put it somewhere. Yeah, that's pretty awesome It's

taking me five days to be able to say that without crying.

So I'm proud of you for that That's actually that makes my heart sing. It really does so you want to be able to ignite? Other people. Yeah. My question is, how do you ignite yourself first? I know you want to help other people and [00:19:00] do it other people and that ignites you, but you can't ignite anybody else until you ignite yourself first.

Right. And that's why I'm kind of, I'm leaning on my strengths so much because they're me and it's infinitely me. I am infinitely unique. Like if you, if you go and look at the numbers, nobody else in this world, either before or after me have these exact strengths in this exact order. And that's the beautiful thing about it.

So, and the fact that I just kept pushing myself down and once I put this in writing and I was just, and I, and I said it for the first time, I was just like, I'm this over the weekend. You know, and I'm like, it's still like a smidgen there, [00:20:00] you know, here being Tuesday. Yeah. Cause it is Saturday. So, you know, but it's because I just, I feel like.

So many other people, it's just like, you push yourself down just to get life done. And, you know, it's just like, you can't keep doing that. And, and, and I think that's where all this frustration is coming from is because everybody has just been so suppressed. And not being able to be creative, and I'm not saying in a way, like an artist way, just creative in anything, you know, so with creative, with creating connections with others, you know, creative and, and how they do things, you know, and processes and such, you know, creative and, you know, just learning.

You know, you don't have to do it through a book. You can do an audio book, you know, that as an example, you know, creative and how are [00:21:00] they going to move somebody else forward? So, and, and that's the beautiful thing is when you, when you see people like light up when they're just finally understood, because I feel like so many people are just not understood right now because they don't believe in themselves or they haven't allowed others or others haven't been allowed to get to know them.

And this, this kind of brings all that out. So that's what inspires me. That's what ignites me. When I see what I, my mentor calls this and I call this a strength smile. And it's a beautiful, beautiful thing. You just can't put any definition to it. It's just. Awesome.

And, and that's how you make change in people.

Yeah. You see, you recognize those problems, you recognize their lost and you find out what ignites them. [00:22:00] And then you have the gift of being able to find that. Not everybody has that gift. Not everybody can actually sit down and, and listen to people to the, there a point where you find out actually what ignites them because you actually have to sit down and listen to them longer than 18 seconds.

Exactly. Right. And if you have that ability, if you're capable of doing that, you have something that most people don't, at least not a good percentage of people.

A lot of people lost it. Unfortunately,

we had a lot less people before, but now we have even less people now after COVID, because we lost a lot of human connectivity.

We lost a lot of touch with ourselves. Uh, We learned to talk over long distances with each other via TV or, you know, like the computer or whatever, but there's still something missing in there and I think we need more of whatever that is, things we're missing and [00:23:00] you are, you can find it. I think you could find it in other people, not just, you know, like you and me talking, but physically actually going out and helping other people the way you do.

Thank you. Yeah, I can feel it. I know it. So what's your, why we talked about what I want to talk about. Why now? Why, why do you think you have this ability? Why do you think you do this?

Well, I didn't know how easy it was going to come to me once I learned about it and I start seeing not so much patterns, but you know, just combinations of things.

So it's like putting points together that don't usually go together. And, um, making sense of it. So I really can't explain it, but it just, it just,

[00:24:00] why I wanna do it is because I'm so tired and of seeing people just sad or disgruntled or misunderstood because everybody's got strengths. They're just different. And when you get people together, especially a group of people together, and you see, and everybody's talking about the strengths of 1, another, instead of the weaknesses or.

You know, there's no shaming and looking for somebody's strengths. It just, it's such a great environment to be in. And I think more people need that.

I agree with you a hundred percent. More people need that. What I'm interested in though, is why you think you have the capability to ignite? Why you have the, why do you think you have the capability of helping other people ignite [00:25:00] their, their inner strength?

So I'm going to make it go deeper. Yeah. I gotcha. And we're looking for that, that, that next door.

Yes. Well, it's because, you know, I want to also, I want to leave a legacy. I want to have something that my kids can, you know, See me succeed with and, um, other than just like getting a job or whatever. And, um, and the fact that I can touch on certain points, not pain points, strength points.

It's like, so I can. I almost can't put it into words. It's so strange. It's just like, you know, if someone is like asking me a bunch of questions, I was like, you really like going deep with people. You really like finding [00:26:00] all that information out. Yeah. You know? And it's just like, now, what do you do with that information?

Do you just kind of put it away and they're able to bring it out later on? Yeah. You know, and just seeing that is amazing because. I, you know, I just want to pick just a couple of things that a person does, like, like somebody who, who is a deep thinker, you know, their mind is going like this, you know, but those people who are influencers, their little motions, like what I'm doing are outward.

You can see it, you know, but I recently figured out that I have a lot of the internal stuff. So I have a lot going on in my head. That not people, people don't see, but then when I let it out, it makes a difference. And that's part of my, why I was like, why I've been holding this back so long, I need to [00:27:00] just do it.

So that is definitely part of my why, because it makes me feel good that I'm able to, I'm able to help. I'm able to move to, um, to find some of the best qualities in people rather than, you know, just. Anything that's in appearances.

So what do you, what do you think is holding you back from these, uh, being able to expel this, uh, these ideas or being able to talk? I mean, you're, you're talking to me about holding things back or something was holding things back from here for being able to come out. What's stopping you? What, what do you think is stopping you from bringing that out?

Well, I'm

just, I'm starting to get over the, cause when we last talked, we talked about my grandmother and how she told me, you can't do that. You can't start your own business. You know, and I had that topped off with an uncle who did the same thing, and even though he owned his own business and it's just like, Oh, [00:28:00] it's just too much hassle.

It's too much, this too much that. And it's just like, but now I'm like, uh, finally to a point where I can sit in and this just literally happened in the last few days. It's just like, what's happened has happened and I can't change it. What they've said has been said, and it can't be unsaid. Now, how I react to it is where I can change it.

So that's why I'm saying I want to ignite the belief within, because it's just like, I believe I can do it. Thank you.

That's exactly what I was trying to tell you in the last session. Like almost word, like I'm tearing up right now. That's just makes me so proud that you're able to come up with that. I'm like amazed at you being able to say that because that's exactly what it's about.

And, and you're doing exactly what I said, acknowledging the past is, you know, acknowledging that it's there. It's not going to [00:29:00] be undone, but taking that and then turning it into something positive, something different. That's going to be positive, not just for you, but for the next person and the next person and the next person that you ignite.

Right. Um, your uncle, tell me a little bit about your uncle. He had a business.

Yeah, he actually owned his own business. Um, he was one, I think of four sons who, um, inherited a shop from their father and from his father. And, um, it was a tailoring business, very fine Italian suits. And, um, so he had, you know, he had, you know, people that he had to go and see, like, say, literally in Italy in order to find the fabrics and he had, you know, his, um, not seamstresses, but his tailors and then.[00:30:00]

You know, also had the salesman, you know, so we had, you know, the overhead, he had, you know, the payroll and, you know, he had the whole nine and got burnt out. So, but I mean, good news is, is that he was, I think his space was bought out. I don't remember the whole story, but so that kind of helped in a way, but he definitely, once that happened, he's like, I'm not opening another store.

I'm good. And this was years ago, right?

So, so what I'm seeing now is your, your grandmother. And we talked about her, so I'm not going to go too much further into that, but now you have your uncle, were they the married couple or, or so your grandmother? Oh, no. Okay. So it's grandmother. So your uncle was in a business he did not want to be in.

Yeah, he didn't like, he didn't like

it. So when you're doing something that you don't like, [00:31:00] what tends to happen?

It kind of rings in my ear, and that's part of it. It's like, don't do it. It's not worth it. And

what I'm saying is though, and I understand your, your answer and I appreciate that answer because you're right, but that's not where I'm going with this.

Your uncle was in a business that he didn't like. So when he hears about somebody else talking about going into a business, he's going to be negative about that because the business that he has. Yeah. He hates. Or had. Or had. Yeah. He hates. And I bet once he actually got rid of it, he was very happy to get rid of it.

So when you hear in your head that your uncle said, don't start a business, understand the only reason why he's saying that is because the business he had, he hated. For sure. For sure. A little, a little different than grandma, but at the same time, it still has, it still predicates the same way somebody said something that was negative to you.

You don't want to do this. You can't do this. So it, it, it [00:32:00] makes you hold things back, but. I'm glad to hear that you're actually starting to just make that shine more. You're starting to let yourself come out more. You're starting to ignite yourself more often. Things go ahead. It's okay. Sorry. That's okay.

Um, well, I'm really glad to hear that. That's what really makes me feel good. So tell me about the how, how does this make you feel? Um, I want to hear about how all of this that we talked about up to this point makes you feel. I'm

starting to feel a sense of freedom, even though I don't have the money. I don't have the, you know, I don't have the, the time I haven't, you know, gotten to the point where it's just like, I work four hours a week and it's great.

You know, I'm not there, you know, I'm not retired from my job. Just the thought is so freeing [00:33:00] and it's like, I can, I can do this. You know, I want to I want to go do a workshop. That's what I want to do. That's what I want to start. I don't care if 1 person shows up. I don't care if anybody shows up, you know, if no 1 shows up, I should say, I don't care if 100 people show up, you know, at least if I put it out there and I've actually, you know, put a date and then, you know, which I'm striving for February.

I do know that much. And, you know, I just need to find a venue and, you know, where to do it. So I'm going to start like. All right. I don't know, community college, not college community center, because looked into the library and you're not allowed to sell things. So it's like, okay, well at least I tried and I was told no.

And I didn't like, Oh, I'm not just not going to do it. I'm still looking. So that's the part that's so freeing is that it was like, I got through the no. And I'm not accepting no, I'm going to keep going. [00:34:00] Good.

Yes. Yeah. No is not always no. No is I have to change something or tweak something so I can get a yes.

Exactly. Right. Um, it's good to have freedom, even if it's not like technically freedom, like time freedom, but it's freedom up here. It's freedom to be able to think. It's freedom to be able to express. It's freedom, uh, of, of getting into your zone of genius without having anything hold you back.

Yeah. And you don't feel like you're just kind of bobbing along.

Right. So, I mean, a lot of people will have the idea of what freedom is and they think money and time. That's the first 2 things I think pop into people's head when they hear the word freedom, but for people that know better. We know freedom is not always just money and time. There's other parts of us as humans that want to be free, free to think, free to act, free to do.

Right. And I'm seeing you do [00:35:00] that more and more now, right? Absolutely. I want to hear more about this workshop. Tell me about this workshop.

Well, basically it would just do, um, a. You would, you would get, you would precursor to the workshop is that you have to get your strengths report and you have to get your full 34.

So that way, when you come in, we would be able to talk about, you know, where do you fall? Do you like to connect with the right people? Do you like to just to do things the right way? Do you like to just move people forward or do you like to think, create and or learn? And then there's the fun ones that have multiples.

You know, that can have two or even three of those things that they do together. And then you'd get real curious as to how that, how does that work for them? You know? So, and then they can create like a liberation statement. [00:36:00] So I don't have to do this, you know, and you can look at your strength report and actually put it into words.

Instead, I get to instead of saying, I have to, I get to that has been huge for me.

Yes. Um, I get to my third interview of my podcast two years ago made a point of that and that changed for me too. And he, once I heard that, it kind of opened up a few doors for me. So I understand completely where you're coming from when you get to say that to yourself and you should, the more you say that to yourself, the more positive things are going to be for you because you get to go to work, you get to breathe, you get to wake up in the morning, you get to watch the sunrise, you get to drive a car.

There's a lot of different things that you can put that into. That'll make a big difference. Um,

I've got no one to thank, but, but my mentor [00:37:00] at Evia, cause he was the one that put that together and I'm just like, I want to do what you do. And I don't feel like I have. The, um, the feeling of I'm, I'm taking from him.

I don't, I feel like I'm just helping, helping it along, you know, because we need so much more, you know, and he's like one person and I was like, I can do it on the East coast. Let me do it.

Well that's good to hear you say, because in our last interview, you felt like you were stealing from him.

Right? Yeah.

I was feeling like that.

Yeah, I'm glad you've come to the realization that you're not stealing from him, but you're just carrying on in your own way what his teachings are. Absolutely.

Right?

Yeah. Um, is there a way you can do the workshop without selling?

Probably. I mean, so, [00:38:00] and I've actually thought about that.

It's like, I want to do the workshop and I want to say, this is the beta. Come, come with me, come to do this. And I don't even know if I, I've been toying with the idea of maybe just doing zoom first. Rather than in person, because then I don't have to worry about like, work out money for a venue, because the place where I live, there's a lot of places that.

Yeah, you can, you can come here, but it's this much money and I was like, well, not there yet, but zoom is free. So, you know, for a certain time for a certain amount and I've got the version to where I can have 999 of my other. My friends with me and so I've been toying with maybe just doing a zoom first and saying, okay, how do you like this, you know, by throwing it out there for people who are local.

So that way, if I do decide to go ahead and do it live, then they can come and we can meet each other. And I [00:39:00] think that's where I feel like it's more important. Even though, again, I'm not a relationship builder, I don't have to connect with people, but I've learned that I, people need this. So even if you're not a relationship builder, just to know that the fellow man's got your back in some way, shape, or form, you know, instead of having to look behind your back and say, or who's stabbing me now, you know, it's like, who's lifting me up instead.

And I feel like that is just being lost right now. So if you could be in a room with people who are just looking at your strengths and not what you can't do. And what you don't have to do, I think that's just going to be amazing.

But do you necessarily have to sell something to do that?

Anyway, I guess you sell everything, don't

you? True, but I think when, and where I'm going with this is [00:40:00] the library. Oh yeah, that's a good point. There is a way, because the library will do it for free. True. But you can't sell something, so don't, just give the talk. And then people that resonate with you will contact you.

And then you could take it from there because now you're outside the library. The library is going to be the free venue that you don't pay for that. You get your name out there. That's all that's going to be for, even if you only do it once every two months. Right. Yeah. Schedule the time with the library.

Talk about what you do, but don't sell anything. Even don't even mention it. Don't even mention to the library. And if they say something, okay, cool. I'm not going to sell anything. It's fine. I'm just here to give a talk, a structured talk about. Workshop, whatever, you know, whatever it is, workshop is right.

But I'm gonna promise you, I will not sell anything that will get your [00:41:00] name out there that will get people to start following you. Maybe even on social medias, depending on now, I don't know how far along, if they consider, you know, follow me on social media selling, I would actually ask them about that.

I'll have to find out, see what the line is. Um, I've actually, uh, out here, uh, I'm going to start. Asking, there's a local charity group out here that has a workshop there that actually I can go to and do a venue for free. And I'm not going to sell anything, but I'm going to teach them how to start a business.

That's all it is. Oh, very good. And then if they decide they want to go further, they'll contact me. But at the same time, what am I getting out of it? I'm learning how to actually stand up and speak. I'm learning how to actually talk about my workshop more and more, articulating it better, listening to myself, say the workshop, recording it, of course, and then [00:42:00] listening back to say, you know, I could change that a little bit and then refine, refine, refine, refine.

That makes sense. So, I wouldn't put, I wouldn't put the library completely out yet. Okay. And then, if you get the right person to listen to you, they'll say, Hey, I have this happening. Would you come speak? Right? That's a possibility too. So, there's a lot of possibilities out there that are free that you don't have to cost anything or even sell anything.

It's not just for them, but it's for you just as much as them because you're teaching yourself how to speak. Right. Yeah. That

makes sense.

Okay. Lots of practice there.

Lots of practice. I am actually going to start speaking online. I'm going to start speaking on, on YouTube and Facebook, just doing lives. And I'm going to start teaching myself that way too. There's all kinds of ways that you [00:43:00] can get your word out there of what you do without selling anything.

I'm not going to sell anything, but somebody will, somebody will contact me because I was able to reach to them in one way, shape or form. Okay. I like it. You like it? Yeah. Yeah. All right. Any questions at this point?

No, this has been pretty eye opening, um, because I was going to discount the library. But I'm not going to because I don't need to sell something on my beta group.

It doesn't even have to be a beta group. It just, Hey, I'm my speech is about workshop. Come see if you want to see it. It's free. If anybody's going to want to see it for free, who wouldn't want to see it? That's in that's interested in building whatever workshop is about. Okay. You even said yourself, even if nobody shows up.

I'm good with it. You're good with it. See exactly. [00:44:00] If nobody shows up, then you could sell, you know, so, so something else I want to talk about real quick. And this is the one you're prepared for. I threw all that at you. I'm sorry, but I want to hear about this SOP that you've been working on.

Okay. So I had to start it from like absolute scratch and um, I don't have it with me.

I'm sorry, but that's okay. Um, I know, I know what I need to do. So another, and, and. In trying to keep my, um, my head clear in order to stay focused, I have noticed that I definitely have to have my space. And if that is my absolute number one, make sure your space is clear. So then I can go ahead and start.

But then I've also learned that I have to keep it in smaller increments. You, you like hit the [00:45:00] nail on the head when you were just like, I work three jobs and I was like, and I do this and I do that. And I was like, how on earth do you find the time to build your business then? You're like, well, I have this time and this time.

And that's all I've got. I'm like, well, if he can do it, you know, we all have the same amount of time in the day. Right. It's just like, why can't I? So, you know, so I've gotten myself involved in a men where I'm a mentor and, you know, so I have that structured. I have to be on the zoom at this time, you know, on this date, no matter what, Hey people, I can't do anything with you during this time and this time.

So. You know, we'll just work around it. And so far, so good. I mean, I'm only two weeks in, but Hey, I'm actually doing it. So, and you know, so the, I'm starting to get that structure and I was like, all right, and this, this mentorship is only for a short time. It's only for a couple of months. So [00:46:00] it's like, then I know I can take that time.

And delegate it to something else because I already have it dedicated for something. So, but then I also have for me, a list things that I can check off. I like checking things off. So that makes me feel good. You know, it was like a sense of accomplishment finally, you know, and, um, and I also like learning new things.

So I allow myself a little bit of time, learn something new to help me move forward. And. Implement so that's the part where I haven't been strong was like, learn something new that I think is going to move me for and then I didn't implement. And so now I'm giving myself the time to actually implement.

So, and so that's a part of the is like, take this time, you know, check it off that you did it, but that you implemented it and it's not finished until you implement it. So, so that's where [00:47:00] that's at now. I'm working on how to figure out content and. Getting that worked in, because I'm in the middle of switching platforms, uh, because I, I ended the platform I was in.

Um, and since we last spoke, and I also got rid of the email marketing that wasn't doing anything for me. So, so that thank you. Yes. Yes. So, so now I feel like I'm actually when I do. Put stuff out there, it's actually going to bring the raving fan I'm looking for rather than just some empty to me, an empty email to them, an empty email or empty offer, because we don't have any sort of connection whatsoever.

Other than here's an email. Here's an offer. Do you want it and I haven't gotten anything. So, you know, so, um, and I don't just need the, the, the click per action. I just. I want [00:48:00] something that's going to help literally move me and them forward. You know, if it's just like, thanks, have a nice day. I don't want, I don't want to have that.

Non lasting impression. So, um, but anyway, so I'm going to be learning a new platform. So I've put some time aside for that during the weekend. And, um, in order to do like funnels and, and, um, the CRM and all of that stuff, it's just something new. I'm learning that, you know, about G chat, GPT and AI and all that.

So that's going to be super helpful in helping to create when I get. It's like, all right, here you go. This is what I have. Make something for me. And then it's pretty amazing, you know, what it comes up with. I was like, Oh, cool. Okay. Now put this spin on it, you know, or make it a six week or do that. You know, so [00:49:00] I've been having fun playing with that.

So I have to play first before I can like narrow it down, but I'm, I'm in the midst of playing. I'm learning what I need, you know, in the way of like course creation and all that stuff. So it's been an interesting ride, even though it's only been a couple of weeks. So,

um, yeah, AI has helped me a lot in, in my podcasting for sure, because it helps me write my transcripts.

It helps me, uh, with show notes. It helps me with titles. I'm a terrible writer. I'm going to tell you that right up front. I'm a terrible writer. You know, he ate his biscuit, you know, that's terrible. So it's nice to be able to use it as a tool. Not so much as do it for me, but use it as a tool to get the juices flowing.

So I can come up with something, even if it's a title, like it's still tweaking a little bit of making my own. Um, but the, but it's going to be the future. It's totally going to be the future and the way things are going to be running. So we got to kind of keep that in [00:50:00] mind. Um, what else, what else is going on with that?

Um, in the way of the SOP or

yeah, because I got clearing a space for yourself. I got boundaries that we talked about kind of clearing the space for yourself, the list that you made for yourself and, uh, and the content.

So what else is now helping me with the implementation? Okay. So, um, I've got. Questions for myself that I'm answering in order to then take the step into chat GPT and, you know, go ahead and get something created with that.

So that way I can then. So this is part of the list, you know, and then, um, I already know my date, so I have to, like, figure out how I'm going to make all this work before. What date did I push? I mean, a 2nd. Um, I think I did [00:51:00] the 17th. Of February, so. That's my goal. If I meet it, great. If I don't, I'm not going to be upset with myself.

And here's the reason why, because I've actually worked towards it. So, I know that I have definitely had some mentors in the past that are just like, don't miss that date. Make sure you do it. And when I get that pressure on me, it just makes me shrivel up. Nope. I'm not going to be able to, because something in life will happen.

And then it completely throws me off and I'm like, now I'm never going to make it. And then I get so upset and so riled up and it's just like, then I start thinking about everything that could possibly go wrong and it all goes wrong. So I don't want to do that to myself. But the fact that I'm actually taking steps forward is what I'm trying to start celebrating instead of just, I'm trying to implement the enjoy the journey, not just the outcome.

So. That has been helping me with this SOP because it's [00:52:00] giving me things to check off.

So, I, I like that. I, and I was actually going to make that point, but you made it for me. Don't get upset if you actually don't make it, but at least you're, you're in the journey. You started something and it's nice to have a goal, but don't be upset at yourself. Don't sabotage yourself because you don't make that goal.

Um, and that's something I had a lot of problems with before I started my business. I had a very bad habit of sabotaging myself when it came to anything that I wanted to do. If I wanted to buy a car, if I wanted to have a date with my wife, if I want anything for some reason. I always sabotaged it and the reason I sabotaged it is because I didn't feel I was worthy.

I didn't feel like I was capable, so I would self sabotage to stay in that, in that square in that little elevator or whatever you want to call it. [00:53:00] So, uh, I learned about the upper limit problem that I had and that goes in, I think you said you read, read the big leap. Yeah, that my upper limit was terrible.

It was so low that I was always sabotaging myself. But now that I know about what I'm doing and I see the same thing happening to you now, cause you have these SOPs, you have these, and the mindset that you have now where you're not going to sabotage yourself raises that upper limit. Right. So I see you raising that upper limit for yourself.

Um, so that's amazing.

Thank you. Yeah, there's a, um, there's a great, um, necklace. I think I saw it on a uncommon goods. Um, it's this little circle that's broken glass and it's to represent the breaking the glass ceiling. That everybody puts themselves in.

So I always think of Willy Wonka and the chocolate factory [00:54:00] when they break through the ceiling.

Oh yeah. That's what I did. Whenever I talk about that, that's the thing that goes through my head. It's breaking through the glass and the ceiling and the glass elevator. Tell me about clearing your space. What does that mean?

Physically clearing my space. Like, I have to have the clutter gone if it, if my space is cluttered, then I end up thinking about way too many things and I'm not focusing on what I need to do.

So, so it not only helps me with. You know, visually outwardly, it helps me internally too, because I just, I know if I, if I have a cleared space, then I can like focus on what it is I need to do and knowing that I have cleared that space for that amount of time. Because my, my clearing of my space isn't just my [00:55:00] physical space, you know, and, and mental, but it's the time.

And that's the part I think that has been the biggest for me because I wasn't allowing myself, I was like, Oh, well, I can just go quickly do some laundry. I can do the dishes real fast. Oh, I can take the dogs out, you know, and next thing you know, my hour that I was giving to myself was completely gone. So I don't.

I have cleared the thoughts of doing all of that so that way I can just focus on what I need to do and answer my questions and checking off my list and, you know, figuring out the next step, you know, so.

But what's that also called?

I don't

remember. Prioritizing.

Oh yeah.

It's not just, it's not just clearing the space, clearing the space is great and you're doing the right thing. But also you got to understand that you're [00:56:00] prioritizing. What you want most first. Yeah. Right. So you want to have your time first, the time, not just the time to do what you do, but the time to clear things out, the time to clear your head, the time you're prioritizing yourself first.

That's a big step. Really hard. Yes,

it is really hard for somebody who has responsibility high. Cause you always take on way more than you should. Cause you say yes more than no and, or yes, instead of not now. So, and, and then you're just completely overwhelmed. Exactly.

So, and it's funny that you put it this that way too, because you're going to understand when you say yes to something, that means you're saying no to something else, right?

When you say yes, I'm going to take [00:57:00] the dogs out for a walk, which means you're saying. No, to yourself, because you're taking that extra time away from what you've actually prioritized for yourself. When you say yes to the dishes, same thing. I'm not saying don't do them because you have a pile, you never get rid of it, but at the same time prioritize.

But at the same time, when you say no to something, what are you saying yes to? What are you saying? Yes. I'm going to say no to this. So I can say yes to Lori, I'm going to say no to this. So I can say yes to working on my checklist, right? Yes. Those both ways. So when you're

here, I'm sorry, go ahead. No, no, you go.

So for me though, whenever I say yes to something, I literally take psychological ownership of it. Every aspect of it. And it's fascinating when you're talking to me about prioritizing and everything. So I'm taking psychological ownership of the yes. [00:58:00] And I've always, always, always done that, but I've never taken psychological ownership of the no, which has been huge because now that I've taken psychological ownership of no, this is my time.

It's been, it's, it's been quite the tug of war before, but now it doesn't feel that way. It feels like, no, you're doing this for everyone that you've been wanting to do it for, you know? So yes, you can say yes to them. Um, and. You know, um, and, and, you know, you're going to own up to it, you know, you're going to do it, but when you say no, because this is going to be good for you, meaning of them, then it's good for me because then I can, I was like, look what I did.

I got some accomplishment. I don't feel frustrated. Oh, you seem so much better. Yeah. Cause I actually did something that I wanted

to do. Exactly. [00:59:00] And that's going to circle right back into freedom and it's going to circle right back into your why. Right. Yeah. It all builds from there.

Love it. So when you feel the urge to say yes to something, you're no, you're thinking you really shouldn't say no. Don't, I mean, it's hard to do. Yes. You're right. Don't take psychological ownership, but stop and think about the answer before answering like this. Can you do the dishes? Yes. Think, wait a minute, if I do the dishes or if I do this or do that, what am I saying no to?

Right. Take that extra two seconds to think about how that's going to work out. Kind of future it in your head so you know if you really should prioritize this ahead of Lori.

Exactly. So, and I'm good at like turning a thought into action like [01:00:00] that, to the point that I don't get the goals done that I want to get done. And it's like, and then I get so mad at myself. And then you're in that, that lovely hamster wheel and, um, horrible circle to be in, but it's great when you break out of it.

Yeah.

It is. It's very freeing. Just like we're talking about earlier, when you realize you have the capability, you have the ability to say no, no matter what it is, you have that choice. A lot of us, especially me, when I first, when I was first growing up and going out and doing things, I didn't think I had the ability to say no.

I said yes to everything. And I found myself in a very you. because I said yes to everything and put my feelings, my emotions, my needs, my wants aside. I thought that's the way I was supposed to be because I'm a man, right? I'm a man. I'm supposed to say yes to everything because everybody depends on me.

That's my superhero syndrome happening right there. [01:01:00] So, and I still suffer from that a little bit, but I've broken out of that a lot. And because I've broken out of that, I'm able to do coaching. I'm able to do my podcasts. I'm able to do things that I'm capable of doing because I say no to other people and I say yes to me.

And you could do the same thing. You're already doing it. I need you to keep doing it, Laurie. I need you to keep doing it because you're doing the right thing. What new boundaries have you set for yourself

that, um, those little bit of times that I have for my business is my time. So what are

the biggest thing if I'm, if I'm not prying too much, what are those times?

Um, Saturday mornings, Wednesday evenings. Sometimes Mondays, so Monday evenings, so those are the days that I have prioritized to do things [01:02:00] and even when it comes to like, leaving work right on time. So, that way I can get home, you know, or leaving work right on time and jumping on this, or even maybe staying at work a little bit.

So, I can do the zoom and it's not interrupted because I'm in the car. So, you know, I, I just. Or jotting things down, you know, making sure that I jot those things down to, I've taken the time to jot it down so I can get it done and rather than trying to keep it all in my head. So, those are some of the boundaries that I've that I've given myself.

It's just like, I've allowed myself the time and I know I keep saying time and it's just because I was letting it slip by for so long and. And also allowing the interruptions to get in the way has just. I'm done with it finally. And I can say that with certainty rather [01:03:00] than just in the moment. It's just like, yeah, I can, I can say now.

And then you asked me three things. Yeah, I can do those too. No, I'm sorry. I don't have time. Not right now. And I've, you know, it can, it can, you know, I would let other people's reactions bother me because they would get upset. You know, I, I didn't want to rock the boat or whatever, but I'm really good at rocking boats and I'm okay with that now, as long as I wasn't

before, as long as you rock them your way.

Right. Right. Exactly. Not somebody else on the outside doing this. Yeah. Right. You're doing your own rocking.

Exactly. Okay. To create, to create my own waves, not just ride somebody else's.

So have you found spaces of time that you didn't have before that you have now? Yes. Give me a couple of [01:04:00] examples. This time

at night.

Yeah. Because normally I'm in bed, so, but I found that it's like, all right, I can do this. And, you know, I've figured out, you know, some supplements that can help me not just relying on caffeine and such, you know, and, you know, with using Saturday mornings, because I don't work on the weekends and I used to have jobs where I worked on the weekends, you know, I, I can't say I don't have that time because, Oh, I can sleep an extra hour.

Oh, I can just, you know, chill out for a little bit longer instead of chilling out. Let's do something productive. So, but not to the point where I burn out, so I'm trying to find that, that medium. But right now, because I only have it set for small increments, you know, it, it's not going to burn me out if I stick to it.

So, but I'm also allowing some flexibility to [01:05:00] if in the event life happens. But I'm doing it for life, not because of life.

If you plan for those things to happen way ahead of time, then you know, if they do happen, you're prepared for them. You know, that's why a lot of times I'll do my podcast three or four or five episodes ahead of time.

Because what happens if on those particular days that I normally edit, something happens, I have to take. You know, my cat to the vet or something happens with my wife or something like that, you know, as long as you have that time that you've put aside and you know, you're that far ahead, you could take that extra time to, for those emergencies and not have it encroach into what your time actually is, or, you know, that you've planned for yourself or the things that you've planned ahead of time for yourself.

So that's good. Yeah, that's really, really good. Um, tell me about your list together. You'd like to X. You'd like to cross things out. You'd like to check things. Tell me about that.

Well, it's just, [01:06:00] you know, the fact that I have each day in order to do it, like I'm for this. For this time, I'm going to learn for this time, I'm going to answer questions in order to help me create the course.

And for this time I'm going to, you know, um, really those are the only two times that I've got right now, you know? Okay. That's okay. The third time would be like, like eventually do coaching. So this is what I'm going to coach. This is what I'm gonna mentor. Mm-Hmm. . So, um, so the fact that I was like, yes, I did this, and yes, I did that.

So, yes, I did the learning. Yes, I did the answering of the questions that has been huge and, um, now I get to do the next step, which is. Figuring out the new platform in order to start to do the content and the email sequences and all of that stuff. So, um. But [01:07:00] still keeping in mind that I want, I mean, your idea of trying to do the free thing and not selling that's going to be freeing as it is, you know, so I'm excited about that.

It's like, you know, why, why should I sell? I mean, I know why I should sell, don't get me wrong. Um, I was about to say, why should I sell something? But I do want to sell things. So I didn't want to get out of the nine to five, but, um, but by the same token, it's just like, well, let's take that step and see what that brings me.

At least I'll have the connections and I'll start getting, you know, some of the, the audience coming to me rather than it just be nothing because I can't find a venue or whatever. Um, so I'll have that as, as, as a check mark hopefully in the near future. .

Yep. Money is a byproduct of your service and how well you serve others.

Exactly. So if you, if you want that money, don't just go in, don't be like your emails where you just go in [01:08:00] there and pitch, right. You wanna go in there. You want to go in there and create connections. That's coming into my head. I know we're talking about your list, but I want to make sure that

it's fine because, you know, if you can create trust and create community, you're going to ultimately create, you know, success.

Right. Exactly. So if you have your checklist, say, for example, but you miss a check, what does that, what, what kind of emotion was that have for you? If you miss a check.

Depends on the day. Um, usually what it means is like, Oh, I'm going to circle back to that the next time. So, or I will carry it over to another list.

So that way it doesn't get lost in the shuffle. Whereas before it would irritate me that I didn't get it done. And then I get into that whole mindset of this isn't working. It's too hard. Uh, you know. [01:09:00] Why should I do this? You know, and then I hear, you know, grandma or my uncle, it's just like, yeah, we told you.

Right. And it's like, no, no, no, no. I'm going to show you. So is where I'm going with now, you know, whereas before I was like, yeah, they're right. Why should I bother? So, but I don't know, ever since I figured out that whole ignite. It's not bothering me as much, I'm able to circle back to it. Or if it, if it keeps lingering, it's like, well, it must not be a priority.

So just let it go for now. Just kind of give it back. You know, somebody else will take care of it, you know, and just, just to help me with Keep to keep

moving forward. Good. That's actually what I was hoping you'd say. Yeah, I was, I was hesitant there for a second, but then you came around to it. So, okay. So yeah, [01:10:00] if, if it's, if it keeps building up and building up, if you keep getting that zero instead of the extra, whatever, that means either it needs to be prioritized somewhere else or gone all together, or you delegate it.

If you can, if you can, if you have the capability of delegating it, then do it. Even if it's a family member, Hey, can you take care of this for me real quick? Or something like that, um, sometimes a VA can do it pretty cheap, you know, that depends on how things work for you. But the, the point there is I'm glad you had a plan for that zero that didn't work out.

Yeah. Cause I know before you just, like you said, you'd get frustrated about it and would just keep bugging and, and like the whole time. So thank you for that. That's amazing. That's exactly what I was hoping for. You're welcome. Tell me about this platform that you have and that you need to learn.

Well, it's new to me, but I'm sure it's not new to a lot of other people.

It's [01:11:00] um, system IO, I think is how it's, how it's written out where you can have the, you know, the funnel pages, you can have the CRM, you can have the, and it's not as expensive as some of these CRMs that I've had in the past. I was shocked. I was like, what I've been paying so much more for that in the last, on the last two platforms that I had.

And I was just like, are you kidding me? And this has been out here for how long? And I'm like, great. So while it does frustrate me that I have to fight to, to learn yet another, um, platform, it's not WordPress, which me and WordPress did not get along. Just like me and HTML did not get along. So. But if this seems like it's pretty simple to put together and like cut and paste and just plop and I'm just like, [01:12:00] okay.

And there's a free version to it. So which was even more shocking to me. So that's why I just need to learn it. And so I can like put things together, put back together a website and. That's where I'm going to have my friend chat GPT helped me do.

Yeah. Good idea. Some of the ones, uh, some of the ones I work with actually have a, a, uh, AI already integrated in with it.

So instead of having to go to chat GPT or anything else, all I have to do is go to their, their AI, they have built into it and then just do it there.

And this one may have that. I just literally learned about it like a couple of weeks ago. And I was like, what? Yeah. So. A creative is using it. She's doing a phenomenal job.

She's got funnel pages all over the place. She's got email sequences done and it's just like, and she just threw it together like that. And I was like, I'm not as good as she is in the way of how she can quickly put things out there, but I'm [01:13:00] excited about the fact of. The fact of the ease the, of something that I can do without having to like literally get into step-by-step programming.

So, which other others that I've done were like that. I was like, uh, just give me a teal. I don't care what the actual color code is of the, how many digits and or cap letters it is, I don't care about that. Just, just gimme teal.

That's awesome. Good. I'm glad you're getting into that and it's having, that's going to help you a lot. It's going to help you with your email marketing. It's going to help you with your creativity. It's going to help you with a lot of different things that you didn't even know you could do until you actually get down and get to it.

Uh, yeah. Make sure you set time aside for yourself too. Even if you're just watching a quick YouTube video on how to do blah. That's only like 10 minutes. Hey, now you know how to do it. Or at least, you know, where to go to for the resource. That's how I learned a lot of what I do. I just went to YouTube on my lunch break.

I took [01:14:00] 15 minutes while I was eating a sandwich and learn how to use Canva. Nice. You know, I take that extra couple minutes when you're doing something. That's not a whole taking up a whole lot of energy and use that. To learn something, to self educate yourself. And that's another thing I wanted to go over with self education and what you're doing to self educate yourself for these things.

So it sounds like you're self educating yourself for these, um, for the new platform, the system. io. What else are you self educating for yourself? Well, I

joined the inner circle for taking strengths to a whole new level. So I, it's an inner circle, like mastermind and, um, with a group of people who. Don't need to learn like the, um, the beginnings of, of how to go through like a string support, but actually going into depth with it on a whole different level than what it was designed for.

So, and I think it's going [01:15:00] to be amazing. So I'm, I'm doing that right now in the way of self education, um, when it comes to the strength side of things. Now when it comes to the, um, the system and everything, I do have a person I can reach out to in order for her. And it's the one, the creative I was talking about who could teach me how to use it.

And I'm willing to, to spend money with her, you know, for one, to, to further her and her small business and two, to help me get the education. So it was kind of when it went and you know, I could go faster than what I'm doing now. So those, those are the two things I'm doing right at this moment.

So how, how is that going to affect or get you to the next level?

What do you think that's going to be like?

Well, the fact that I would actually have something in play that I could promote that, you know, um, it's somewhat tangible. I mean, it's something to actually look [01:16:00] at and see, and you can't touch it, but I mean, it would be operational rather than just put together.

Yeah. I have a website. Go to this website, but you know, the links don't work and this don't work and I don't try the course. You know? So. I would actually have something complete and that's what I haven't had this whole time is something complete. The 1 time I did have something complete, it costs me a lot of money and then I had no traffic to it.

So, and that is not my intention this time, nor my goal. So I'm going to make sure that it will eventually pay for itself.

So what are you going to do this time as compared to last time? What's that going to look like?

Just not give up when it got hard, not have those thoughts to stop me in my tracks like I did before.

So I'm holding on to [01:17:00] ignite for dear life at this moment and, uh, because it's going to just help me and others. Me more so than others. So I just, I just need to do it. Life is too short. I've seen too many people passing in recent days that it just, it's hit home hard.

So it's the same thing for me to, I just say, you know, I'm, I'm, I'm seeing that as well.

So that's probably one of the reasons why I'm doing what I'm doing to same thing, you know, but when I say what, what you need to do, how, how do we not spend that extra money? How do we not. Fall down that same rabbit hole when you actually have a product, what are we going to do from there? Okay. Let's say we've actually made the product.

What are we going to do with that product? How are we going to accomplish that?

Well, with having partnerships with this mastermind, that's going to be help helping to keep me in check. [01:18:00] So, um, I have accountability in those other people, not just for myself, because I know I can quite easily go off on a tageant.

Tangent somewhere and rabbit hole, whatever you want to call it, it just go completely in left field and I won't come back from it. And then I'll get, because I'll get mad and I'll just be, I'm done. I can't do this and at least with this group, that won't be allowed. So, like, why are you, you know, the questions would be raised.

Why are you going in that direction? You know, you said you were going to do this, you know, let's steer your back. So it'll help me stay in my own lane. Okay. Rather than trying to go all over the

highway. So I just, a quick suggestion, I want to make sure I get this out to you. When you have the product done, use these people to your [01:19:00] advantage and have them test it for you.

Okay. Okay. Cause that's going to get all the most, not all, but most of the kinks out. Sorry, my camera keeps going weird. Um, we, we don't want to put it out there and people like not buy it. And then you lose all this extra money because that's what happened last time. So we're going to avoid that by testing, not just testing the product, but testing to make sure that the product is wanted.

Exactly. Right. So you earlier talked about a beta group. You started using that terminology earlier, right? We want to do the same thing for this, for this course that you're making. You want to try to get a beta group in for free or cheap, like five, 10 bucks or whatever, even though you're going to sell it for 200 a pop that way they can contest it.

Make sure it's good at the same time too. They're going to let you know, will I even buy this for free? [01:20:00] I don't know. Right, right. So you don't waste too much money. Are you going to waste more time than money at that particular point, because you had time to make the course. Okay. But it's easier to spend time than it is money.

Once you spend the money, it's gone. You can make up time. Yes. And no. Well, yes. And no. Yeah. I see. But do you, do you see where I'm going with on that? I do. Okay. I do. All right. Um, yeah, I can't get that time back after you've spent it, but what I'm saying is you can use more time to adjust. Anyway. You know what I'm talking about?

I do. So, um, make sure you use this group to your advantage, have them look at it and see if they think it's viable. And if they don't think it's viable, make sure you ask them why.

Yeah. I know. I want to get the feedback as to why it doesn't work or I also want to get the feedback as to why it would work.

Yes. So that's, that's where I'm going. That's where I was going to go with it. So, [01:21:00] even with doing something at the library, you know, can you see yourself, you know, doing a course like this? Can you see yourself, like, doing, you know, something that would involve a price and. You know? Yes. No. Maybe so. So I just know I have to be careful with that, with, with the library because I'm not supposed to sell something.

Yeah. You

gotta be careful crossing that line a little bit.

Exactly.

Exactly. You'll figure it out though. I'm sure you will. I'm pretty sure you will. So. All right. So what do you, you know where you're at now? What do you want to see for yourself? What's your next goal? What's the next thing that you maybe possibly need help with?

What's the next thing to happen for you, Lori?

Well, the SOP was the biggest step, um, to definitely get things rolling. Uh, and now it, with that checklist, I want the sense of accomplishment of like something tangible and [01:22:00] done. So, um, that's the part that I think I need more time than anything else to get through.

So, um, I, I know that may not be the best answer for your question, but that's really where I feel where I'm at right now.

No, that's okay. You need an SOP for your SOP. Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. As weird as that sounds, that's kind of what you need to do. Yeah. You know, you, you need to sit down and actually make a plan of when and how you're going to put your SLP together.

I mean, you got it started, but we need to, we need to continue on that and make sure we have the, the, the time, the energy, whatever you need to get that SLP done. Cause that's, that's going to be a main cornerstone of what you're going to accomplish.

Yeah, and it'll obligate me to have the deadline so I can actually have a sense of achievement, you know, and getting those, those goals and actions done.

Don't go overboard with [01:23:00] it where you have this, you know, the sense of achievement, but at the same time, if you don't make it, you, you falter. I

understand that, you know, but I, I need to have some kind of sense of urgency. Otherwise. I don't, I know I can go easily go into that lax, a daisy, I'll eventually get to it.

I don't want to go there.

So who ultimately, who is this SLP for? I know it's for me, for me or vote for you. So you know, don't let yourself down. That's exactly. And that's the only real drive I use for myself is don't let me down.

And that's kind of where I'm at right now. I mean, I didn't think that, you know, 2024, my year, blah, blah, blah.

You know, I wasn't feeding into that or, or even buying that until I was just like, you know what? Life is too short. I gotta do, I've got to do this. And when I figured out that, like I said, and I keep coming back to it, the word ignite, it just. It just [01:24:00] sends this whole, like, burning desire to get things done.

So is that your definition of Ignite? The burning desire to get things done?

For now, yeah. Cause it'll, it'll be forever evolving, you know? So, but that's

where I'm at. Make it part of what you actually do. I mean, Ignite is a word, but we need to have a really strong definition of what Ignite actually means to you.

And be that thing. I'm not saying, you know, give me the definition of night right now. That's it's, I know it's still giving me a work in progress, but having, having that definition of what Ignite actually means to you is what's going to drive you forward and, and point you in a direction because now we have a word chosen.

We have a def, we have a word chosen. Now we need to define that word 100 percent without question. [01:25:00] And I guess.

I know I keep coming back to time, but you know, burning desire to get things done, you know, in order to keep moving me forward. So if I don't move forward, if I don't get things done in order to move.

To the next step, that's where I, I go down the rabbit hole and, and start like messing things up. So, um, but now to say burning desire, which just kind of came out of nowhere. Um, that's how the best stuff comes. Yeah. Really, uh, really just kind of sets true. So, you know, if I don't get it, it's like, who's going to do it if I'm not going to do it.

I got it. I just have to get it done.

I would actually do, um, I don't know, have the capability of doing it right now. It's probably late. Um, a post it brainstorm on the word ignite. Do you, do you understand what that is? I do. Okay. [01:26:00]

So I understand that completely.

Right. So I would actually start with the word ignite.

It just take 5 minutes and everything that makes me. I could associate with Ignite, that's what I post up there and use those posts in those brainstorms somewhere in those posts, post-it notes, you're gonna have your definition of ignite because you're gonna let it flow. It's gonna flow outta you and, and that's how I do everything When I come across something like that, where it's a definition where I don't have something solid definition or anything along those lines, I will do a post-it, brainstorming and it's always in there every single time I've done it.

The definition of whatever I trying to find. It's in those posts and notes because right now, subconsciously you're kind of thinking about it. Plus I'm on a screen plus, you know, blah, blah, blah. And my editing brain's thinking, yeah, need to shut that all off. And just have your creative brain work 100%. And that's what that's going to do for you.

So I would actually strongly suggest doing that. And it only [01:27:00] takes about 5, maybe 10 minutes after readjusting everything and sectioning everything out. But ultimately, in the end, you're going to have your full definition. What ignite actually means to you, Laurie.

Okay, that makes sense. That makes sense. I hadn't something like that before.

It was more like a word. It's along the lines of like a word dump. It doesn't have to make sense. Just write it down.

But the problem is on a word doc, you can't really group things. So after you're, after you're done with that, you start grouping ignite. Okay. This is an emotion. This is, uh, This is, uh, an SOP.

This is, uh, you know, you could start moving things around and that's why I love post it notes. I wish I could buy stock in it just because the capability of, of pruning, the capability of, oh, this, you know, why did I even say that? You know, being able to move things around like that, you really can't, you do that in a work doc.

There's [01:28:00] other programs that you can do that with other brainstorming programs, but they cost money. And why would I do that if I wanted to spend 80 cents on a pack of post it notes?

And I have plenty of space behind me. Yeah. See, there

you go.

So I would definitely, I would actually do that to find your full and definition of Ignite you can use as a, your tagline. Like my tagline, I can, I am, I will. And I'm doing it today. Um, something strong like that. For yourself with the word ignite or use ignite as an acronym for something or Ignite is going to be something major in your business.

It's gonna it really is. I really have a feeling It's gonna be something major but you need to find out where it sets in your business so you can use it for Whatever it ends up being

okay. Okay. Now you got my brain just Turn it. [01:29:00] Okay. That's what I do.

All right. So how else can I serve you? Is there, is there anything else that you want to cover?

You want to talk about, um, anything crossing your mind, anything like that at all?

No, I've got some good, good things to go do. So I want to get those done first before diving into something else. So, okay. Good. Make sure you

get some sleep first. Cause I know it's late. So, okay. So I'm going to do the same thing I did last time.

What are the top three takeaways that we talked about?

Well, um, finishing the SOP congrats on letting go of things that didn't work for you. Um, I love the idea of the post it notes with the ignite. So I know that's, that's three already. And, um, basically just keep on keeping on.

Keep doing what you're doing because you're so far you're heading in the right direction.

Thank you.

I'm glad to hear [01:30:00] that. Yeah.

And besides going to bed, what's one thing you're going to do after you get up in the morning? I guess because I know it's late. What's the one major thing you want to make sure you accomplish right away?

I'm just going to keep re I'm, I'm definitely going to keep reading what I wrote from Saturday.

That's going to be first and foremost. And, um, then try to, I don't know, I want to spend, make the time, you know, figure out, schedule the time in order to do the posted thing. Cause now I'm like looking in behind me and I've got all these little boxes and I'm like, I could fill all of that with posts. So, you know, I might just figure out schedule a time in order to do that.

So make sure

you make sure you set yourself a timer for five minutes. Otherwise you're going to fill that thing up and completely over overwhelmed yourself.

I'll make sure to do the five minutes. No worries. That would be something I could do in the morning. You know, when you wake up [01:31:00] fresh, it's just like ignite.

Okay, go. Yeah.

Basically. Yeah. You know, finish your coffee first. So the juices are flowing there. Okay. All right. I'm going to stop recording here, but I do have something I want to talk to you about real quick. Okay. Sure. That was close. I almost did that last.